Back from Christmas traveling, back on Tumblr, recovering from being sick.
I just got to talk to Lauren, probably my oldest friend, with whom I have not talked in years. We grew up in good ol’ BA together, getting into so much trouble and having so much fun. Her mom was the first real surrogate parent I had. Her mom was the first of many to come who shaped my life into something much brighter than my home life. Her mom was the first suicide I ever knew, the first of many which irrevocably formed my feelings about death, loss, grief, life…
Because of the hustle and bustle of life, we lost touch after our first year of college. We still kind of kept up with each other over the internet from e-mail and blogs. It was so great to chat with her. We are planning on getting together while we are still on Christmas break since she is only two hours away for the duration.
It’s unnerving talking to her. It’s the most mixed experience. At once I feel weird and uncertain because we were so different the last time I saw her in person. And yet, it is the most fun and familiar feeling talking to her again because we both know so much about each other. When you know someone from such an early age, you truly know who they are, what they are composed of, what is fundamental to their person. It is so natural to fall back into the familiarity of our friendship and yet the diplomatic adult in me suggests that I must proceed with caution lest I offend someone whose outward manners have changed.
How funny we humans are. We change, yet stay the exact same, and change again.
